Perfecting One-sided Arguments

District Attorney:  Judge, I would object to Counsel’s characterization of this disagreement.  He is giving a one-sided view.

Judge:  Of course he is.  That is what you expect from a trial attorney.

(from an actual court transcript)

Victim of a Car Crash? Here is What You Do…

Beware of who you get your legal advice from following a car crash.  Earlier this year, the Manhattan federal court accepted a guilty plea from a New York attorney for conspiring to defraud a health care benefit provider.  According to a press release, Jeffrey Squitieri, of Englewood Cliffs, N.J., was arrested while coaching an alleged car accident victim to commit health insurance fraud.  He didn’t know the supposed victim was an undercover agent as he urged the agent to make multiple doctor visits and undergo unnecessary procedures. That was the latest of legal problems for Suitieri who was disbarred last year for converting client funds from an escrow account.

Love-triangle Brawl Leads to Trial Judge Suspension

A Wal-Mart brawl with the new lover of his estranged wife led the Arkansas Supreme Court to suspend a trial judge for 30 days in October.  On April 5th police were called in to intervene when a spat between the two men escalated into a scuffle that sent them down on the floor on April 5th.  The fight started when Circuit Judge Sam Pope of Hamburg, Ark., spotted his estranged wife and her new admirer, identified as Bill Murray, in the Crossett, Ark., Wal-Mart and the two exchanged words eventually calling each other “ass-hole” and throwing punches.  The state’s high court suspended the judge for misconduct and ordered him to attend anger management classes.

Air-pressurized Flusher Causes Toilets To Explode

Federal class action lawsuits are, ahem, exploding against the maker of an air-pressured toilet system that allegedly literally explodes under certain conditions. Flushmate has recalled its pressure-assist flushing system, but at least five suits have been filed already and more are on the way.

According to one press release, “the system, which has been fitted into several brands of toilets, uses a pressurized vessel that compresses air as the water tank fills, resulting in a more powerful flush when the air is released.” Of course, it’s alleged that a faulty weld seam causes the entire system to leak or burst under pressure. Flushmate not so literally sat on the information without informing manufacturers or consumers.

Soar High, My Legal Eagles…

Circaetus gallicus : a snake eagle swallows a prey while flying.  Photo by Juan lacruz.As long as you are men, that is.

The wage gap between men and women across many industries in America is a well-known fact, but it is how organizations choose to deal with this gap that separates men from boys (women have no say in this). To reaffirm this truism come along these juicy allegations courtesy of the Port Authority of New York and New Jersey.

A former high-level lawyer for the agency, Donald Burke, is claiming in federal court that he was forced to resign in the face of retaliation for refusing to go along with discrimination against older, female attorneys employed by the agency.  Mr. Burke alleges that more experienced women were paid less than younger men.  After he refused a request from higher ups in the general counsel’s office to alter job evaluations to make the disparity appear justified, two of the lowest paid women were fired to make the disparity less stark, he says.

In a separate action against the Port Authority, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission alleges age discrimination and Equal Pay Act violations on behalf of the fired lawyers, Shirley Spira and Dolores Ward.

Photo by Juan Iacruz.

California Family Sues Illegal Cockfight Site Owner For Wrongful Death

The family of a California man has filed a first-of-its-kind wrongful death lawsuit against the owner of a property where he was fatally stabbed during an illegal cockfight by a razor-sharp “spur” attached to a fighting rooster.

The bird apparently pierced the leg of Jose Luis Ochoa, 35, cutting a vein, as police were breaking up the Jan. 30 cockfight in a remote area of Tulare County. A police sergeant said people started fleeing and, in the commotion, “One of the roosters jumped at the decedent.”

Continue reading the full story.